Gemini/Monkeys

Monkeys and Geminis resemble each other, I always used to say. When you consider the energy level of this New Astrology sign, it’s as though someone took twelve Monkeys, piled them on top of a dozen sets of twins, installed a couple Rolls-Royce jet engines and then let ‘er rip. These people never cease moving. In fact, I wonder if Gemini/Monkeys ever sleep. Gemini/Monkeys love to talk. They need to perform, and even, I am afraid, to show off. For this reason, Gemini/Monkeys enjoy entertaining and watching others have a good time. They plan giant festivals and feasts complete with hand-opened oysters and lobsters flown in from the farthest reaches of the earth. A Gemini/Monkey bash is a guaranteed jolly time for all, your all-time unforgettable pig-out of a lifetime, your best party memory ever–until of course next week, when Gemini/Monkey will be throwing a far more sedate party. This time he’s only inviting seventy very select friends. “We will begin at six with a wine-tasting. We’ve brought in a sommelier from the Tour d’Argent. After that will be the balloon rides. We have to do that before it gets dark. …” The attractions are endless. Gemini/Monkey excess knows no frontiers. If you have a Gemini/Monkey for a friend you’ll never be bored again.

With all of this apparent folderol comes the best aptitude of all–genius. Yes. Gemini/Monkeys are always brilliant. Not only do they have active, vivid minds, that can make quantum leaps in a single bound, but Gemini/Monkeys have wildly creative spirits. They are always on to some new breakthrough idea that will revolutionize the horse-racing industry–and they may not even be vaguely connected to horses. But one day they were watching a horse race and it popped into their heads that if such and such were so and so, then maybe the races wouldn’t have to be thus and such. Gemini/Monkeys are addicted to improvisational living. They hate to do the same thing twice in the same way, and therefore spend much time imagining new solutions.

There’s a bit of the snob in our friend the Gemini/Monkey too. As he enjoys everything bigger and better and grander and smarter, a touch of class, he feels, never hurt anybody. You can count on the Gemini/Monkey to have at least one fast car in his garage, and elegant brand of dog and an equally chic and very proper mate. The accoutrements are part of the show– and with Gemini/Monkeys the show is life itself. Don’t think that Gemini/Monkeys are as light-headed as they are lighthearted. These are self-reliant, responsible independents who are not averse to buckling down to a hard day at the office or a heavy single-handed spring cleaning. They know how to do such a variety of different tasks at once that watching them work is akin to viewing a master juggler in the center ring. The Gemini/Monkey can delegate authority well. And he doesn’t believe in being bossy in order to get people to work for him.

This person is a born iconoclast. Rules, he thinks, are made to be broken, flouted, torn up and written anew. Smashing idols is to the Gemini/Monkey only the first step in true progress. If he can’t prove that a fusty old rule is dull and simple-minded by mere logic and a bit of persuasion, then he will make short work of testing that brittle old law. Don’t ever tell a Gemini/Monkey not to ride his bike in a hospital corridor or you will soon see him cruising down the hall in Ward III.

The rule-breaking this subject gets up to can cause him serious trouble. He is not a crook or a criminal. But he could very well be called a troublemaker by higher-ups. Generally his genius saves him from utter destruction by those too serious to see beyond their own belly-button lint. They know he’s impossible. But he’s so necessary to their cause that they won’t let him go. Exile is one tactic used in trying to discipline the Gemini/Monkey. But no matter which remote boondock they banish him to, the Gemini/Monkey will come up giggling and raring to try his skill at some new implausible scheme.

LOVE

This is no ordinary lover. The Gemini/Monkey is a demanding and insistent gourmet of affection. He needs constant attention and will stop at nothing to have the spotlight permanently turned his way. It is this person’s ingenious charm that eventually seduces those he courts with such craft. How would you respond if your beau placed a diamond ring in the bottom of your bubbling champagne glass? How would you like to be presented with a shiny red sports car just because you caught the Gemini/Monkey’s eye at a dinner party? The bigger, the better. All’s fair in love–and in war? Well, Gemini/Monkeys don’t take well to amorous conflict. They like their romance clear-cut and without ghosts.

Loving a Gemini/Monkey is not particularly complicated, though. You simply have to be willing to spend your whole life standing blindfolded on the very tip of a very springy diving board with a strong wind blowing from behind. That’s all. Just stand there and quake. Of course you also have to do all the dirty work because Genius is too busy blowing up balloons for the party to remember to wash the dishes. But never mind, what you get in return is a full-time nonstop fun and games. If you like show biz, the Gemini/Monkey is definitely your kind of mate.

If you have a Gemini/Monkey in your life and feel a lot like shooting him or her from time to time, I can certainly understand. The Gemini born in a Monkey year is an exhausting challenge to the sedate people he often chooses to love. Yet, there is so much joy in the best moments spent with this dynamo of imagination that all I can advise is–great, unflagging patience. If a Gemini/Monkey loves you, hold on tight. You’re in for the ride of the century.

COMPATIBILITIES

Why don’t you take up with a Libra/Rat or Dragon? Your senses of humor match well. Aries/Dragons and Monkeys are good for you too, as are Leo/Rats and Aquarius/Dragons. You’ll fail miserably if you try to woo a Virgo/Tiger or Snake, a Sagittarian Ox, Snake or Dog. Worse still would be the spotlight-grabbing Capricorn/Snake. You want all the attention, remember?

HOME & FAMILY

Gemini/Monkeys like to have all sorts of different homes. They dream of living in the mountains part of the year, in the tropics another, and then again in Rome or Milan or why not Morocco? Whenever they go, Gemini/Monkeys are quick to settle in, claim the loveliest hut for their own and set about inviting a zillion people in for a smorgasbord. Although they are fond of luxury and class, Gemini/Monkeys cannot be accused of trying to impress with their wealth. To them, an environment should bespeak the understated elegance of a fine leather easy chair and expensive but lived-in carpets six inches thick.

As a parent, the Gemini/Monkey is extremely serious. He may have many children and will love them and tend to them with equal kindness and understanding. He doesn’t, however, like being misused, and will react badly to any relative, child or otherwise, who tries to dupe or trick him. The Gemini/Monkey possesses enormous guile himself. But he tends not to apply it to cheating those he loves. He’s a fabulous friend, faithful and out-on-a-limb involved with his old pals and cronies. He never forgets people with whom he’s had fun.

The Gemini/Monkey child is a handful. Hyperactivity is not unusual in these kids. They must be directed and disciplined into applying their talents and using up each day’s energy that day. Otherwise, they may keep you up all night. Sports, music lesson, clubs and–most of all–theatrical experiences will both please and excite the Gemini/Monkey child. Keep the never-a-dull-moment Gemini/Monkey busy and I guarantee you your child will be happy. Pay attention to him when he has achieved. But don’t give him too much free applause.

PROFESSION

This person is gifted in very serious, intricate and difficult roles in life. He can be anything from a cancer research specialist to a high-minded theatrical director. But this person thrives on change, variation and diversification. Truly, the Gemini/Monkey is the most mutable of all the mutable signs. No matter what he does it must involve the opportunity to invent, to innovate, to create new methods and points of view. He is vibrant and full of mercurial mental motion. He must never be stuck in a dull office or forced to work in a bank or any confining place. The Gemini/Monkey cannot tolerate isolation. He likes space and requires company and attention from coworkers.

As a boss or director of operations, this person will manage very well. People are attracted to the antics of the Gemini/Monkey and if he is careful to surround himself with a loving audience, he will never have to use force or coercion to see that work is done. Even at his silliest, even when he’s rolling around laughing at fate and the damned rules, the Gemini/Monkey still inspires admiration and respect in his “subjects.”

 

Some Gemini/Monkeys: Paul Gauguin, the Marquis de Sade, Ian Fleming, the Duchess of Windsor.